Awareness of Death Helps Me to Appreciate and Live a Good Life!

As I said last blog I have been trying to remember to be grateful and to do Lama Marut's  2-part morning loll each morning. The first part of the loll includes gratitude as I elaborated on last blog. The second part is all about considering our impermanence and using this to make the most of our precious lives.

Like us all, I have had family and friends who have passed away. Despite understanding that  it is part of the cycle of life and having studied Buddhism and Death Awareness, I am often still taken by surprise when death occurs. 
 
In the past I have been reluctant to consider death. I felt it was morbid and did not want to think about it because I was fearful. I am sure I am not alone as I think in our culture, we tend to be afraid of death. However, when we bring a wise understanding to death, we are able to let go of fear and appreciate our lives more. 
 
I now understand it is not helpful to put my head in the sand when it comes to death and that awareness and understanding help me to be more realistic and to make the most of each day of my precious life. It also helps me to appreciate others too, to not take them for granted and to remember to tell them that I love and appreciate them.
 
The idea to live every day as if it was your last is an interesting one. If I truly thought today was the last day, I had to live I certainly wouldn’t waste time getting angry, upset or worried. I’d make the most of it to connect with those I love to tell them that I love and appreciate them. This is great to reminder to do all the time. 
 
There are three Buddhist death awareness contemplations I find most helpful. These are…

1. Death is certain
2. Time of death is uncertain
3. What will matter when I die?

Death awareness does not mean we are not affected by death or that we don’t care. It helps us realize the truth of death, that we can’t control or fix it, which opens us up to a deeper level of compassion and wisdom. We don’t need to know or understand death, but instead let go of the intellect and cultivate a relationship with the mystery. As J.K Rowling says ‘the next great adventure.
 
I find these three Buddhist death awareness contemplations most helpful. My understanding of these are…

1. Death is certain

Death happens to all of us. This reality is bought home when we recall all the people, we have known who are no longer with us. Being realistic about our own and others deaths helps us make the most of our lives. Burying our heads in the sand about it prevents us from doing this.

1. Time of death is uncertain. 

I want to believe that if I live a healthy life, I will somehow guarantee living a long life. While it is certainly good to do our best to live a healthy life there are no guarantees that this will prolong our life into old age or give us the average life expectancy. As we know there are many ways our life can end, including sickness and accident. The time of these events is beyond our control. 

1. What will matter when I die?

I believe what will matter when we die is how we have lived our lives. All we need to do is our best to live a good life. Living a good life is about kindness, both to ourselves and others. When we do our best to be a kind, ethical and a positive force for good in the world we are living a good life! I believe J.K Rowling’s ‘well organised mind’ relates to living a ‘good life’. We create that well organised mind through living a good life. 
 
So when I have done part one of the loll and thought about all I have to be grateful for I then do a brief contemplation of these three understandings. I think about the certainty of my death, the unknown time of it and remind myself to live a good life and do my best to be kind positive force in the world. Awareness of death helps me to appreciate and live a ‘good life’. 

With love, appreciation and very best well wishes to us all 
Maree xx
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