Better FOR Others - Relaxed, Appreciative and Generous

​Like most of us I have had lots going on this past month. While it is easy to get caught up in the frenzy and business of the festive season I have been trying to be mindful of four things, relaxation, generosity, appreciation and the secret of happiness. Thankfully these are states of mind I can cultivate to be better FOR others and a more positive force in the world. So I am doing my best to give them a go!

1.  RELAX 
Staying relaxed this time of year, especially when there is so much to do can be tricky Some things I find helpful to remember are ...

• To avoid the label 'busy' and instead think of it as activity. So I have been active (thanks Monique) this past month with lots of fun 'POM'ing around. I find if I can avoid mind going on an unhelpful 'I'm so busy' rant and instead apply joyful effort to do what is needed, I have more than enough energy and much more fun. If I take the worry about 'me' out of  'me being so busy' it is just activity (and fun). Also remembering to set realistic expectations, be kind and encouraging to all (including you) and to take time to RELAX to recoup between joyful effort bursts helps too!
• So when I find my mind going into that busy spin I do my 3 R's - Relax my body, Release the busy thoughts and Return to the breathe. I can then resume what I am doing with a more helpful mindset and stop the worry about myself and make it about benefiting others! Which is the secret of my own happiness.
• And a revisit of the text I sent last week .... 'RELAX and remember stress and worry about ourselves makes us unhappy and doing what we can to benefit others makes us happy'   

2. GENERORSITY 

• Giving is good for us and this is the perfect time of year to practice it. Not only does giving make you feel good on an emotional level, studies have shown that giving can also greatly boost mental and physical health. With lower blood pressure together with increase self esteem, feelings of happiness and self worth, giving is great for everyone involved.
• Our giving does not need to be restricted to material things or to Christmas either. We can give of our time, share our resources, give physical assistance, a smile, a meal or kindness in so many ways. 
• Our family for many years has been doing a home made Kris Kringle. This is lots of fun and gives the opportunity to gift time, energy and creativity to make the perfect gift for our kringler.  

3.  APPRECIATION

• I love the word appreciation. My friend Shadi told me about having 'appreciative eyes', and I try to remember to look with these at everything, including myself, instead of my critical negative ones. 
• When I can appreciate things and be grateful for all that is happening in my life I can turn problems into opportunities and feel happier. As I am sure you know gratitude is a very powerful way to feel happier instantly and a great thing to do each and every day to promote well being. We have so much to be grateful for with our amazing lives. The New Year might be a great time to start a gratitude journal!

4.  THE SECRET OF HAPPINESS
As I am sure your know, the secret of our own happiness lies in doing our best to benefit others! So instead of feeling sad, sorry for, stressed and anxious about ourselves bringing to mind others and what we can do to benefit them is the way to go!

We all love to feel we are being of some use and benefit to others. It  makes us feel happier. This together with the social aspect of being with others and connecting together to be a positive force in the world, enhances our self esteem and gives our lives meaning.

Hilary, our 90 year POM embroider, wrote a beautiful card to us all recently, which I think encapsulates these sentiments perfectly, it reads....

To all the POM team members (I love the fact it was not addressed to Sue or I, but rather inclusive of us all!)
Many thanks for including me. It makes all the difference to feel I am being useful. Tons of love Hilary. 

And another quote from Lilla Watson
If you have come to help me, you are wasting your time. But if you have come because your liberation is tied up with mine, then let us work together.

And from the Dalai Lama
The true meaning of life 
"We are visitors on this planet. We are here for ninety or one hundred years at the very most. During that period we must try to do something good, something useful with our lives. If you contribute to other people's happiness you will find the true goal, the true meaning of life".

So this is what POM is about Appreciation, Inclusion, Connection, and Generosity. It is about us all working together for mutual benefit - promoting peace of mind, well being and meaning. So lets celebrate together all our efforts, no matter how small, to be a kind, positive force in the world!
My heartfelt love, appreciation and gratitude to you all. 

Kind Regards 
Maree xx

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