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Gratitude is a Super Power!

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I am grateful to be looking at gratitude yet again this blog!
Gratitude is an awesome superpower. I read recently that one of the most powerful statements you can make, feel or think is ‘thank you’. Thank you to others and yourself too.
 
It is so helpful to remember to be thankful to all those people in our lives who have been motherly, kind and caring toward us, including of course our own maternal mothers, to whom we owe so much, including our lives. Remembering to be thankful to friends, family and strangers too for the kindness they show us in all sorts of ways is powerful to promote our happiness and peace of mind. We'll talk more about gratitude for mothering kindness next blog, as it will be Mother's Day weekend. I'll be on board travelling from Canberra to Sydney!
 
It is also great to be thankful to others who give us the opportunity to be kind to them. This includes, friends, family, pets, strangers and of course our children or anyone we care for.

It's great to remember to tune into our wise selves to be kind and thankful to ourselves too. Seeing ourselves be a positive force in the world, being kind and grateful creates a happy perception. We can reinforce this goodness by being thankful to ourselves. We can be grateful to ourselves for doing our best to be a kind, positive force in the world. Remembering also to forgive ourselves and others for all those so called ‘mistakes’, more helpfully known as learning opportunities. 
 
The opportunities to extend kindness do not always come in the ways we expect and sometimes these kind acts are received without thanks. I find it helpful to thank myself, especially during those times like when I have spent a lot of time and effort doing something like making a family meal which is received with 'I don't like this!' Resting in my intention to have prepared a healthy meal and thanking myself helps to prevent resentment. A space I  have known very well. 

Sometimes extending kindness, especially as parents, can be in the form of a strong boundary like ‘please, don’t speak to me like that’, or ‘no, you can’t do that’. Such Kindness always has the intention to protect others from harm.

I can remember the need for such a strong kind boundary many years ago when I needed to enforce the ‘no sleeping with phone rule’ with my then thirteen-year-old. As I was saying goodnight to them, I discovered the phone under their bedclothes. I removed the phone and there was much subsequent protesting.  I needed to check in with my wise self to remember that my intention was to prevent harm and for them to get a good night’s sleep. I was then able to thank myself for being courageously kind, as the protests continued.  
 
More about gratitude and its awesome benefits next blog.
With love, appreciation and very best well wishes to us all 


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More Things I Find Useful to Say No to or to at Least Minimise

9/4/2022

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​As I said last blog saying ‘no’ can help us live a more intentional and meaningful life and help us to take care of ourselves. We need self compassion and courage to do so and this continues to be something I am learning to get better at. As Joshua Becker says 'Minimalism isn't about removing the things you love. It's about removing the things that distract you from the things you love.'
 

Last blog we looked at three of a list of ten things I find helpful to say ‘no’ to or to at least do my best to minimise. As I mentioned these are things that are distractions for me from what would be best to be doing. Being aware of them helps me to keep 'on meaningful purpose'. Your list may look completely different to mine, depending on what values, priorities likes and dislikes are important to you.  
Here is the list of things I find helpful to say 'no' to or at least minimise include....
1.  Spending money on stuff I don't need, free things and good deals 
2.  Too many social activities and entertainment. 
3.  Keeping up with social media and news
4.  Projects or opportunities I don't fully understand
5.  Unhealthy habits 
6.  Too many words (hence I'll do three at a time over the next blogs)
7.  Negative self talk
8.  Possessions - I have enough 
9.  Digital Clutter and notifications
10.Things that do not align with who I am and my values, likes and dislikes

Let's look at the second three.....
4. Projects or opportunities I really don't understand
Sometimes I agree to do things when I really don’t have an appreciation or understanding of what I am taking on. Taking the time to get clear on what you are agreeing so that you can take the time necessary to make an informed decision about whether you have the resources, energy and willingness to do it. And also, whether by doing it you are impacting negatively on our relationships with others.  

5.  Unhealthy habits
Both our everyday and long time habits shape our lives. It is helpful to do a review of our habits and decide which are benefiting us and which are no longer serving us. So I do my best to keep fit with yoga, walks and slow plod like runs. I also try to get plenty of sleep. Early to bed and early to rise works well for me. I also try to do my best to eat well, although I have just eaten fish and chips for dinner! I also try to do as my mother encouraged me to do 'tidy up as you go". My spiritual practice, including a morning gratitude practice, is important so I try to make this a priority. This is a work in progress for me, awareness and self compassion are key. Remembering to check into my wise self for kind encouragement to look after myself and create healthy habits.  

6. Too many words. Harmful speech. 
The amount we talk often depends on our personality and what work we are involved in. It's important to have awareness around the words we use and when we use them. It is a helpful to ask ourselves is our speech ......... 
- timely 
- necessary
- kind and
- true
before we speak .
Also helpful is 'Right Speech' in Buddhism. The 4 elements of 'right speech' are speech that is...... 
- kind 
- inclusive
- meaningful 
- truthful  
Being careful about the words we use - selecting words with the above elements that lift others up, motivate and encourage them is important for meaningful connection. Not using or at least doing our best to minimise words that harm, divide, untruthful, or are meaningless and waste others time is well worth considering. So I think I have said more than enough! Thank you for reading.

With love, appreciation and very best well wishes to us all 
Maree xx

 
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