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Gratitude is a Super Power!

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I am grateful to be looking at gratitude yet again this blog!
Gratitude is an awesome superpower. I read recently that one of the most powerful statements you can make, feel or think is ‘thank you’. Thank you to others and yourself too.
 
It is so helpful to remember to be thankful to all those people in our lives who have been motherly, kind and caring toward us, including of course our own maternal mothers, to whom we owe so much, including our lives. Remembering to be thankful to friends, family and strangers too for the kindness they show us in all sorts of ways is powerful to promote our happiness and peace of mind. We'll talk more about gratitude for mothering kindness next blog, as it will be Mother's Day weekend. I'll be on board travelling from Canberra to Sydney!
 
It is also great to be thankful to others who give us the opportunity to be kind to them. This includes, friends, family, pets, strangers and of course our children or anyone we care for.

It's great to remember to tune into our wise selves to be kind and thankful to ourselves too. Seeing ourselves be a positive force in the world, being kind and grateful creates a happy perception. We can reinforce this goodness by being thankful to ourselves. We can be grateful to ourselves for doing our best to be a kind, positive force in the world. Remembering also to forgive ourselves and others for all those so called ‘mistakes’, more helpfully known as learning opportunities. 
 
The opportunities to extend kindness do not always come in the ways we expect and sometimes these kind acts are received without thanks. I find it helpful to thank myself, especially during those times like when I have spent a lot of time and effort doing something like making a family meal which is received with 'I don't like this!' Resting in my intention to have prepared a healthy meal and thanking myself helps to prevent resentment. A space I  have known very well. 

Sometimes extending kindness, especially as parents, can be in the form of a strong boundary like ‘please, don’t speak to me like that’, or ‘no, you can’t do that’. Such Kindness always has the intention to protect others from harm.

I can remember the need for such a strong kind boundary many years ago when I needed to enforce the ‘no sleeping with phone rule’ with my then thirteen-year-old. As I was saying goodnight to them, I discovered the phone under their bedclothes. I removed the phone and there was much subsequent protesting.  I needed to check in with my wise self to remember that my intention was to prevent harm and for them to get a good night’s sleep. I was then able to thank myself for being courageously kind, as the protests continued.  
 
More about gratitude and its awesome benefits next blog.
With love, appreciation and very best well wishes to us all 


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Don't Board The Worry Train

4/25/2022

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Do you ever let worrying thoughts take you to a stressful unhappy place? I have understood my teacher Cindy Lee explain this is like boarding the ‘Express Worry Train’ to Devastation Station’. We can resist the urge to hop on board by recognising that these unhelpful and untrue worrying thought habits are causing us stress and unhappiness. Staying on the station, instead of boarding the worry train, gives us the freedom to watch the train pass and put a helpful new habit in place. 
 
Neuroplasticity, that understanding that the brain is plastic or changeable allows us to create new neural pathways or ‘thought grooves’ that are more helpful. With recognition we are able to stop recreating that unhelpful thought pattern groove over and over and instead create a more helpful one that will reduce our worry and make us more able to cope with life’s inevitable ups and downs. 
 
I would like to share the story of my year 11 Physics train wreck, or wonderful opportunity to learn some helpful new habits. I didn’t really like physics or my teacher and while it was tempting to blame the subject, the exam or the teacher I realized I was the one who unknowingly made it a stressful experience. I remember the lead up to the exam. Despite being a reasonably conscientious student who had put in a fair amount of study I decided I was going to fail the exam. I told myself that I hadn’t done enough work, I was too dumb to get it, I would freeze and be unable to answer any of the questions and on and on it went! My funny mind had me aboard the train and to Devastation Station. I was a nervous somewhat hysterical wreck. 
 
That experience and many more subsequent ones have reminded me to BREATHE and to
  • Recognising those negative thoughts, 
  • Accepting them and watching them pass without trying to push them away or feed them with more negative thoughts and 
  • Investigate with curiosity by tuning into my wise self to be reminded to.........
    • not believe those untrue worrying thoughts
    • give myself the reassurance and encouragement I need – ‘you have done your best to prepare, you know some stuff so do your best to share it for those who want to know it (the examiner) and those who have supported you, parents, teachers, friends etc.  
    • Do what needs to be done – continue preparing calmly, get organised to get there to do the exam.  
    • Help someone else, especially someone else who may be worried
With love, appreciation and very best well wishes to us all 
Maree xx
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