POM - Peace of Mind
  • Home
  • POM Activities
  • About
  • Home
  • POM Activities
  • About

Gratitude is a Super Power!

Picture
Picture
I am grateful to be looking at gratitude yet again this blog!
Gratitude is an awesome superpower. I read recently that one of the most powerful statements you can make, feel or think is ‘thank you’. Thank you to others and yourself too.
 
It is so helpful to remember to be thankful to all those people in our lives who have been motherly, kind and caring toward us, including of course our own maternal mothers, to whom we owe so much, including our lives. Remembering to be thankful to friends, family and strangers too for the kindness they show us in all sorts of ways is powerful to promote our happiness and peace of mind. We'll talk more about gratitude for mothering kindness next blog, as it will be Mother's Day weekend. I'll be on board travelling from Canberra to Sydney!
 
It is also great to be thankful to others who give us the opportunity to be kind to them. This includes, friends, family, pets, strangers and of course our children or anyone we care for.

It's great to remember to tune into our wise selves to be kind and thankful to ourselves too. Seeing ourselves be a positive force in the world, being kind and grateful creates a happy perception. We can reinforce this goodness by being thankful to ourselves. We can be grateful to ourselves for doing our best to be a kind, positive force in the world. Remembering also to forgive ourselves and others for all those so called ‘mistakes’, more helpfully known as learning opportunities. 
 
The opportunities to extend kindness do not always come in the ways we expect and sometimes these kind acts are received without thanks. I find it helpful to thank myself, especially during those times like when I have spent a lot of time and effort doing something like making a family meal which is received with 'I don't like this!' Resting in my intention to have prepared a healthy meal and thanking myself helps to prevent resentment. A space I  have known very well. 

Sometimes extending kindness, especially as parents, can be in the form of a strong boundary like ‘please, don’t speak to me like that’, or ‘no, you can’t do that’. Such Kindness always has the intention to protect others from harm.

I can remember the need for such a strong kind boundary many years ago when I needed to enforce the ‘no sleeping with phone rule’ with my then thirteen-year-old. As I was saying goodnight to them, I discovered the phone under their bedclothes. I removed the phone and there was much subsequent protesting.  I needed to check in with my wise self to remember that my intention was to prevent harm and for them to get a good night’s sleep. I was then able to thank myself for being courageously kind, as the protests continued.  
 
More about gratitude and its awesome benefits next blog.
With love, appreciation and very best well wishes to us all 


​

It's Like This Now! What is My Wisest Response?

4/8/2019

0 Comments

 
​This ‘It’s like this now! What is my wisest response?’ tool is so helpful. It has saved me from so much angst and unhelpful reactions to, 'what is happening now'!  have spent way too much time arguing with reality (what is happening now), protesting that things should somehow be different from how they actually are! As Byron Katie questions “Got stress? You are arguing with reality.” Remembering to apply this tool again and again to ‘what is happening now’, instead of arguing against it is so liberating. Acceptance of how it is now and questioning what my wisest response is to what is unfolding allows me to find the blessing in a situation and turn a potential problem into an opportunity to learn and grow.
  
So how do I argue with reality? Arguing with reality for me is my non-acceptance of how things are and the protest that somehow, they should be different from how they actually are!! And as Byron Katie says it is stressful! I was reminded of this several times during my recent trip where I had the opportunity to practice acceptance of many so-called unwanted situations and remember to apply a wise response (although, not always on the spot!). Having done my best with a wise response, I can choose to let go of the result and trust all is unfolding as it is meant to be. This is liberating and allows me to find the blessing or life lesson and turn the so-called problem into an opportunity to grow and learn. 
 
I usually argue with reality when things are not going the way I think they should. Like when we found ourselves on a walk in the beautiful hill country near Ella and we got lost, plagued by leeches, wet may pants to avoid a leech on the bottom and fell in a stream! My protests of ‘the map should be better, they should have told us about the leeches, this shouldn’t be happening, this is going to be a disaster, swearing and hysteria…….etc’ were certainly not helping the situation. Protests of blame, nonacceptance and fear of the future are certainly not my wisest response to ‘what is happening now’ - ‘lost and leeches’. Fortunately, Kate kept it together for both of us and found a reference point to get us going in the right direction toward home. So, what was the blessing in this situation? To accept, look for the wisest response and trust. All ended well, we met some lovely people who helped us, and had such a good laugh and fun on our adventure. We discovered that leeches are harmless, our bites finally stopped bleeding, we had fun turning our room into a first aid centre and have a story to share!
 
Another potential argument with reality was when I found myself at the airport with excess baggage! I watched my mind go into blame, victim and criticism mode. Useful? No! Instead I accepted the situation and decided I would see the excess baggage money like the money I could have spent on a business class upgrade. So now I was travelling business class, well not really, but sort of, as it transpired. It was a full plane and I found myself seated next to a woman whose boyfriend was seated next to a toddler, a few rows ahead of us. I offered to swap seats with him so they could be together. ‘Thanks, but no need, I think my boyfriend has sorted it” was her reply. Shortly after take-off they both disappeared down the back of the plane leaving me with two seats to myself! Thank you for my business class upgrade!
 
And yet a third potential argument was when I was attempting to set up a skype English language class between Anne in Australia and the women at the shelter and discovered the shelter did not have internet or a computer. Again, what is required is acceptance and a wise response! Miraculously we found a way thanks to a computer found in a cupboard, a dongle, Janaki's husband and daughter and a helpful Belgian student.
 
I also realised I can argue with reality when things are going ‘right’ too. Like when we found ourselves in the most wonderful Geoffrey Bawa Hotel in the jungle in Kandalama! I argue with the fact we are staying there the night by telling myself "it is too extravagant, I am not worthy of being there, or trying to justify it, etc…' And I am there, and it is paid for! Instead of arguing, a much wiser response would be to accept, appreciate and enjoy it! 
 
Other useful tools that I had the opportunity to use whilst away included gratitude, patience, and appreciation. I was often reminded how important it was to do my best to connect with others respectfully and in appreciation. More about this next fortnight. 
In appreciation for you all 
Maree xx
0 Comments



Leave a Reply.

    Picture
    Picture
    Picture

    Author

    Maree Fowler

    Archives

    June 2023
    May 2023
    April 2023
    March 2023
    February 2023
    January 2023
    December 2022
    November 2022
    October 2022
    September 2022
    August 2022
    July 2022
    June 2022
    May 2022
    April 2022
    February 2022
    December 2021
    November 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    August 2021
    July 2021
    June 2021
    May 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    December 2020
    October 2020
    September 2020
    August 2020
    July 2020
    June 2020
    May 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    December 2019
    October 2019
    September 2019
    August 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015

    Categories

    All

    RSS Feed

    Subscribe to our mailing list and receive a free Mindfulness Meditation

    * indicates required

POM - Peace Of Mind.


Hours

Monday - Friday: 9am - 5pm

Email

maree@pom-melbourne.com