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Gratitude is a Super Power!

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I am grateful to be looking at gratitude yet again this blog!
Gratitude is an awesome superpower. I read recently that one of the most powerful statements you can make, feel or think is ‘thank you’. Thank you to others and yourself too.
 
It is so helpful to remember to be thankful to all those people in our lives who have been motherly, kind and caring toward us, including of course our own maternal mothers, to whom we owe so much, including our lives. Remembering to be thankful to friends, family and strangers too for the kindness they show us in all sorts of ways is powerful to promote our happiness and peace of mind. We'll talk more about gratitude for mothering kindness next blog, as it will be Mother's Day weekend. I'll be on board travelling from Canberra to Sydney!
 
It is also great to be thankful to others who give us the opportunity to be kind to them. This includes, friends, family, pets, strangers and of course our children or anyone we care for.

It's great to remember to tune into our wise selves to be kind and thankful to ourselves too. Seeing ourselves be a positive force in the world, being kind and grateful creates a happy perception. We can reinforce this goodness by being thankful to ourselves. We can be grateful to ourselves for doing our best to be a kind, positive force in the world. Remembering also to forgive ourselves and others for all those so called ‘mistakes’, more helpfully known as learning opportunities. 
 
The opportunities to extend kindness do not always come in the ways we expect and sometimes these kind acts are received without thanks. I find it helpful to thank myself, especially during those times like when I have spent a lot of time and effort doing something like making a family meal which is received with 'I don't like this!' Resting in my intention to have prepared a healthy meal and thanking myself helps to prevent resentment. A space I  have known very well. 

Sometimes extending kindness, especially as parents, can be in the form of a strong boundary like ‘please, don’t speak to me like that’, or ‘no, you can’t do that’. Such Kindness always has the intention to protect others from harm.

I can remember the need for such a strong kind boundary many years ago when I needed to enforce the ‘no sleeping with phone rule’ with my then thirteen-year-old. As I was saying goodnight to them, I discovered the phone under their bedclothes. I removed the phone and there was much subsequent protesting.  I needed to check in with my wise self to remember that my intention was to prevent harm and for them to get a good night’s sleep. I was then able to thank myself for being courageously kind, as the protests continued.  
 
More about gratitude and its awesome benefits next blog.
With love, appreciation and very best well wishes to us all 


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Texting Mishap! Letting Go of Judgment & Always Getting it Right

8/24/2017

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Do you ever get dissapointed with yourself when you make mistakes? I did this the other day when I had a texting mishap! I often set the high unrealistic expectations, of myself (and others too) of not making mistakes. When mishaps inevitable happen I can wind up feeling dissapointed and disapproving of myself and others too.  This never helps me feel confident, happy or have peace of mind.

Somehow I can have the wacky idea 'I should not make mistakes'. Never making mistakes is not possible. Things go wrong! 

It is also not possible for me to develop compassion or appreciation for myself or others if I am busy criticising and judging them or myself for inevitable shortfalls. As the Dalai Lama reminds us 'Love is the absence of judgment'. So letting go of judgment allows for love.

So, my texting mishap was when I pressed the send button on a message, only to realise 'OMGoodness, I've sent it to the wrong person'

The message was intended for my daughter, who is travelling overseas and I sent it to a Chinese friend, who in many ways is akin to my son, who is also travelling overseas. The message read... 

'Sorry for messaging sweetheart but just to let you know I am working on the no news is good news principal, so keep having a wonderful time being where you are and please don't worry about us here. Of course we are here if you need us. You will always be in my heart and mine in yours. Much love M xx.

I pressed send and then realised what I had done! There was no taking it back, but did I need to? I went straight to 'how embarrassing, how could I be so stupid, I should have been more careful.....' Fortunately I remembered to STOP this self- critical, judgmental, thought train. I asked myself if this was true? No, it wasn't! So Instead of hopping on that thought train of worry, judgment and criticism I decided to...
  • Take a few mindful deep breaths and calm down
  • Send the message to my daughter as well, and tell her I had also sent it to our friend. 'Ha Ha' was her reply
  • Have a laugh myself  
  • Appreciate how they would both be feeling loved and appreciated. Which is the truth. I do love and appreciate them both.
  • Remember that stopping the judgment allows for love, compassion and appreciation of myself and others too
  • Anticipate all wiould turn out well - and it did!
And the reply from my Chinese friend read 'No worries mum, always good to hear from you. It does not bother me at all if you send me messages. I will call you when i get back to Aus.' 

So, instead of expecting never to make a mistake, I can drop the judgment and treat myself and others with kindness, be more encouraging and appreciative of the efforts we all make to be better for others. With this attitude, even when mishaps happen, I can relax and be happy. As Tony Robbins says 'Trade your expectations for appreciation and the world changes instantly.' 


Have a great week. Thank you all  
Kind Regards and Best Wishes 
Maree xx ​
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